I really don't understand this feeling, but when it arises I have the weirdest mood. I don't understand it much as I said earlier so I probably will sound very confusing and inarticulate. Well here it goes.
I feel tired and weary.
I feel guilty of my failures.
I'm having a hard time being joyful.
I am not always seeing the joy in my purpose for God.
I feel like I'm getting attacked by so much work.
I feel like I want to drop my hobbies because of criticism.
I feel like my pride needs to be put to an end.
I want Christ to give me joy.
I want the Holy Spirit to fill me more.
I want to stop complaining(yet here I am)
I want someone to talk to anytime I need it.
I want to stop having wants because I know God can provide.
I want relief from God.
I want to be a spiritual leader.
I want to share the grace of God.
okay you might have gotten bored about my complaints and I know I should not complain,but this feeling has been nagging me and when I put it off it gets worse. I'm glad I still have a will to put an end to these bad feelings. And I'm glad I am trying to look to God in this time, but I feel so lacking and needing of growth. I mentioned I want to drop hobbies because of criticism. I need to really forget about the criticism and think of that criticism in a way that I can better myself next time, but lately I've been a child in my thinking when I received it. This post shows that I have a lot of growing to do. Please pray for me if you read this.
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